Love You

holding your person's wellbeing

Think of your favorite person in the world. Got them in your head? Good.

For a moment, imagine you control their wellbeing. You’re responsible for their thoughts, actions, and behavior.

This is big. You love this person fiercely. You want to do your best to protect them and shower them with love.

You’re aware that daily life presents some big obstacles to our wellbeing – to your person’s wellbeing. You’ll do anything to keep your human feeling good, whole, loved.

So…

Would you convince them that applying for the job, taking on the project, or going back to school is silly?

Would you examine all the wrinkles on their face (that seem to be multiplying every day) and say, Girl, you look so freaking old…

Would you deny them nachos for dinner because, Ummmm, girl, your resolutions?

Would you have them declining lunch with a friend because they should really clean their house? It’s filthy.

Would you call them stupid for leaving the garage door open and allowing a robin to fly into the house and create quite a scene of broken pictures, bird poop and more?

Nope, you wouldn’t.

You love your person so damn much you’d never deny them what brings them comfort and joy.

You’d never come down on them for imperfectly navigating life.

You wouldn’t deprive them of food they’re craving, television that “needs” binging, and the occasional mindless scrolling.

You’d show your person grace because there’s no one you love more. You’d talk kindly. You’d forgive. You’d have a sense of humor about big and little mistakes.

So, why don’t we extend this practice and grace to ourselves?

We know how to love. We’ve just been programmed by society, culture, religion, and family that it’s risky to love ourselves – that external validation is more important than internal wellbeing.

But showing ourselves compassion is essential. We’d never talk to our favorite person the way we talk to ourselves.

So, start talking to the love of your life (YOU!) in the same way you would your favorite person.

Because you’re human. And being human is very hard. But also very joyful when we love ourselves without conditions.

Happy Valentine’s Day from the person who holds your wellbeing in my mind, and is practicing the best ways to love you—and me.